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Writer's pictureKimberly Clarke

Who is the Modern Woman?



Who is the modern woman? This has become a controversial and somewhat divisive term in gender dynamics. The modern woman, a sister to the independent woman, is described as a force to be reckoned with. She's strong, independent, and confident in herself and her abilities. She's not afraid to speak her mind or go after what she wants in life.


But before a true examination of the modern woman can be done, I think we have to take a look at feminism, the mother to the modern woman ideology. The formal definition of feminism is the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes. With that definition in mind, could the modern woman be seen as the personification of an extreme version of feminism? A part that wants not just equality of the sexes, but an independent female existence without the male? As far-fetched as this might sound, it is what’s feared by many who dislike the idea of the modern woman.


The modern woman has been breaking down barriers and smashing stereotypes about gender roles, which can be hard for people with a more traditional mindset to accept. So there is a growing part of society that disapproves of the modern woman. Even though the image of the modern woman is an inspiring one, it has fueled contempt. It is inspirational to see a woman succeed in a male-dominated field or break through the glass ceiling in her career, and it can be a powerful motivator for other women to do the same.


It is also not just about career success. The modern woman is also breaking down societal norms when it comes to gender roles. She's showing us that women don't have to fit into the traditional mold of gender stereotypes. She can be strong and assertive, while still embracing her role in society.


In some instances, the modern woman is also leading the charge when it comes to social justice issues. From fighting for gender equality to standing up against racism and discrimination, she's using her voice and her platform to make a difference in the world. She's not afraid to speak out against injustice and fight for what's right.




Those who question the growth of the modern woman fall into two camps. Some extremists see the modern woman as a threat to masculinity. This group feels that successful and self-sufficient women are somehow taking away from the role of the man in society. This kind of thinking leads to resentment and hostility towards women who are seen as too independent or too assertive. Some of that resentment comes from fear these confident, independent, women will eventually start to think that they have no need for their male counterparts, as though one automatically triggers the other. But one could ask, is this a traditional way of thinking, and are men programmed to think this way by nature? Are they programmed to think of themselves as the leader of the household and their female partners as their support? And is that a bad thing? I mean, is there ever truly a self-sufficient male or a self-sufficient female or do we need each other to have a healthy family unit and a balanced life?


Then there is the second group. This set is not as radical in their views of the modern woman as the first, but they see these women as a disruption to traditional gender roles. One that they are begrudgingly trying to circumvent, where possible. So there seems to be a battle being raged between the idea of the traditional female and the modern woman. Is one lifestyle more ideal than the other? Or should this come down to a matter of personal preference?


This question has come up a lot recently and the answer proves that everything is indeed cyclical. Like fashion, what was old becomes new again. In our present post-pandemic time, there seems to be a shared longing for a return to the basics. Most have felt the need to return to a simpler way of life. More people are seeing the appeal of working from home, taking on fewer responsibilities at work, paying more attention to their mental health, and showing a greater focus on the important parts of life, like family and friends. So too has there been a change in the views on the modern woman and the independent woman. This year, New Zealand’s Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern, stepped down stating that she no longer believes she has enough in the tank to do the job justice. And perhaps also to spend more time with her family after giving birth in 2018 to her daughter while in office, becoming the second world leader in modern times to do that.



Similarly, high-profile stars such as Beyonce, seem to have embraced family life more and have slowed down on their music career, but of course, we will all be at her upcoming world tour. Then there is also that long-delayed album from Rihanna, during which time, she had two children, one recently announced. Another case is that of Ciara, who was criticized recently for her new song, Da Girls. In it, she is celebrating the independent woman’s lifestyle and women who don't need a man, while she is seemingly happily married and taken care of by her husband Russell Wilson. This was seen as quite contradictory and some of her followers made their feeling known in response. One commenter went as far as to say “Ciara we want what you have. We don’t want that independent woman lifestyle,” which is an outright rejection of the modern woman / independent woman trope that was more popular only a few years ago.


So has there been a reawakening of the traditional female and a yearning for the return to a simpler, slower lifestyle? This thinking has also sparked the birth of other movements such as the ‘tradwife movement’ where young women are choosing to embrace the traditional role of a woman as a caregiver and stay-at-home mom in the household. They believe this is the ideal way of life. There is also the growth of the ‘soft woman’ lifestyle where women are embracing a softer aesthetic in their fashion, makeup, and outlook on life. For many, gone are the days of seeking to jump into the professional arena with the men and be a part of the rat race. Some women are opting out, for a quieter life at home.


The pandemic also made many realize that their jobs and the high-stakes professional lifestyle weren't as fulfilling as they first thought and that the simpler parts of life are what mattered. So now there is an even wider divide. Should we, therefore, be celebrating the modern woman and her take-charge attitude in the professional world and her personal life, or the return of the traditional wife and the softer female?


Here is another thought, how about we just celebrate the woman’s ability to choose? After all, that was the foundation of the feminist fight to begin with, to have the female be heard. So, I ask again, who is the modern woman? I say it is the woman who has dared to choose the life she prefers to live and not the one she blindly accepted because society imposed it on her. So here is to women and their choice. However, with that choice, we must also accept the man’s ability to choose. We must accept the man who embraces the modern woman, as well as the man who decides to stay clear of her as she continues to break barriers and forge new paths for those who choose to follow.



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